Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Whine Moan Complain

Sometimes the things that are swirling about in your head (worries, stressors, anxieties) and the things coursing through your veins (mostly hormones) turn you into, what I like to call "Off Mama". Today is one of those days. I am just off. I am short tempered and have no patience. I don't feel like playing Mancala or Doctor Visit. I don't feel like playing Candyland or hauling all kinds of glue and glitter out for a craft. I just want to sit and have my own thoughts. I need to stew.
I now know that this is okay. I know this because Leslie and my sister and Jodi tell me all of the time that days like this don't mean that I don't love or deserve Ev. It just means that I am human. I have learned enough about myself to know that I should not push it. That if I feel this way, I should absolutely stay in the background. It's not the end of the world if Ev has to have a quiet day where her every whim is not met- she really won't remember that through the years. She will remember if her Mama spent one whole afternoon sighing and fussing.

Yes. I am feeling a bit sorry for myself. I have alot on my plate that I wanted to get done today. Nope. This mood prohibits anything constructive. I have to wallow, that's the only way out.

The cat is not helping either. I think he has finally had the cheese slide entirely off his cracker if you know what I mean. He's nutso and annoying and chewing on everything but wanting lots of love so he can bite you mid pet. He even got Sushi yesterday. Ingrate.

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