Another Big Recap

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Because we were at Smokewood for most of the Memorial Day Weekend and because my Dad's computer is on the fritz- I did not have a chance to blog along and now I am sitting here with a bunch of pictures and a few stories but it all seems overwhelming. I will hit the high spots and call it good.
It was a great weekend. We were hopping the whole time and we had lots of places to be and we had lots of fun. On Sat we had a cook out here at the Casa, a Coastie from the station came as well as Aunt Jenny's crew. On Sunday we packed up the kids (the furry and non-furry) and headed to The Burg (Grandma's town), we stopped off at Smokewood long enough to drop off Billy Bones and add Brevin to the retinue, then we went to Chucka and Cheryl's for a cookout there. C&C have a huge yard and it is VERY kid friendly! There was a swing set, a pool with ladder/slide action, a dirt pit with trucks and shovels, a big cardboard box that had a door and some windows cut into the sides, kid sized chairs and lots of other toys. I have NEVER seen B&E play so hard!!! They were exhausted. They were 2 of 7 kids there and all of the kids played hard. It felt nice to have them close by and happily playing while I got to talk with friends and relax. On Monday we stayed in at Gram's, had Brats and goodies, the kids played on the swing set and in the pool there. Aunt Tanya came for a visit. The TV was off nearly the entire time we were there, we just all sat and talked and enjoyed each other.
That about sums it up.
Except that I had to use regular adult sunblock on Ev at Grandma's house on Sunday and she now has a pretty bad rash from it. I took her to the Dr. yesterday as the redness and itchiness were increasing- all's good. Hydrocortisone 2.5% is a good thing.
OH! My weekend did start off with Breakfast In Bed!!! For no reason, other than he loves me, Leslie made me breakfast, including home made biscuits and carried it all up to me in bed. I could get used to that.
There were lots of great small moments from the weekend. Basically I know that I have a great family, great friends and I am in the best years of my life.

I added some stills as well as the slideshow because my sister and the Rad Gang can't view the slideshow at a certain location......

Yeah - Big Bad Nurse Alright

Last night about 4:45 am, Evelyn started crying and screaming for me. I rolled out of bed and stumbled as quickly as I could to her. She was laying there in bed, on her back, just crying and screaming, she would not answer me when I called her name or shook her. I thought she was having a bad dream and I just reached down and picked her up. When I lifted her a bit she screamed even louder and wailed and I heard her say " Mama!!!! I cracked my neck and now it hurts so bad!!!" I looked at her and her little head was at an angle and she was clutching the left side of her neck, towards the back but closer to the shoulder. All I could think was that, here she was with some neck injury and I just hauled her off of the bed and swung her around to get her onto my lap.
Then I had to holler and yell for Leslie. Because, even though I am a nurse, even though I KNEW it was probably just a pulled muscle, even though I knew she was yelling mostly from the shock of waking up in pain, even though I knew that I did not hurt her by lifting her onto my lap....the Sympathetic Branch of my Autonomic Nervous System kicked in. I got all clammy and sweaty, nauseous and head spinny. I really thought that I was going to pass out and I did not want to hit the floor with Ev in my arms, so I yelled for Les. He came. I handed Evelyn over to him and got up to go to the bathroom, as I was not sure WHAT I was going to do. I sat on the toilet and put my head down and breathed deep for a bit, then I splashed some cold water on my face and resumed Mama Duties with Ev.
So that's what it was- she slept wrong on her neck and now has a pulled muscle. OK.
I just gave her some Motrin, cuddled her, reassured her and laid her back in bed in a neutral position, put on some soothing music for her and let the Motrin do it's thing. She fell back to sleep, as did we all. When she woke for the second time this morning, she still has a sore/stiff neck but she is not howling in pain and keeping her head tilted down and to the side. Heck, I even had to stop her from jumping on my bed not 20 minutes ago.
Moral of the story?
Just because you can papoose someone else's kid and assist with about a gajillion facial stitches after a sledding incident does NOT mean that you can even handle the slightest problem with your child. Just because you can help save a person mid heart attack does not mean that you will stumble out of bed and not freak when YOUR child is wailing in pain. Just because you can calmly and rationally assess someone else does not mean that you won't nearly puke when you see your baby holding her neck and crying.
Yeah. Big. Bad. Nurse.

Other Subjects

I have been taking my camera about and getting photos of things OTHER than that beautiful daughter of mine. Leslie and I used to go out and have photo safaris all of the time, it seems though that for 4 years I have had mostly one subject with variations on a theme. I enjoy photography and I am trying to get back in the groove of things. Here are few samples from around my yard. If you are wondering, the bee photos are real and I did take them and yes, I did nearly get stung-many times.

Bullets for the Weary

• Today was the last day of my Nursing Refresher. I studied for 2 days for the final, I ended up with a 96% overall score. Not too shabby.


• Today was the day that my daughter learned to tie her shoes "all beside herself"! I sat and watched and got a bit teary eyed with pride and wonder. Ev noticed that I was emotional and said "Why are you so sad? Because you won't be able to tie my shoes anymore?"


• Billy Bones is convinced that Grandma's house is the coolest house on the planet. Why? Because there is always fresh game in the house somewhere (rodents and etc. brought in and lost by Mom's cats) and he can nap in the sun on a vintage muscle car.


• Evelyn is convinced that Grandma's house is the coolest house on the planet. Why? Because that's where she gets to be with her "all family". And there is a swing set.


• 84 degrees today. Not too shabby. Evelyn and I may forsake the very dirty, in need of a cleaning house to get to the lake and sit in the sand all day tomorrow. Priorities people.


• Today I read a post about a Mama getting on a plane to go and get her daughter from China. I CAN NOT WAIT to do it again.
• I am pretty tired after a couple fo days of non-stop studying and then that final and then another 6 hours of class time after that- thus these bullets.....

So, ummm, yeah

Last weekend we went to a baseball game. Not just any old game. A Major League Game. We went downtown and watched the Indians get beat by Detroit. The score wasn't really the point though. The point was that it was Bean's first time at a baseball game. It was her first time eating Cracker Jacks and yes, there were hot dogs with stadium mustard, there was cotton candy, there were soft pretzels. In short it was a great time.

Just let me mention that IF you take your 4 year old to a game and buy a bag of cotton candy, it would be wise of you to NOT get so involved in the game that you don't realize that the 4 year old in question is ingesting the ENTIRE bag of cotton candy. Because that stuff is like crack cocaine for kids. She was literally vibrating. For hours. And talking loud and fast. For hours.

Needless to say, Bean wants to go for more baseball games, she said "oh! yes let's do that more. Next time I can get PINK cotton candy."

A Single Purchase

Three days ago I realized that our agency has had our MCC (Medical Conditions Checklist) now for about 2 months.
Two Months.
That means that we are two months down people! I am surprised because it does not feel that way. So this got me thinking and thinking. Now I am a bit lip chew-ey and heart palpitate-y. I guess that this thing is real? There will be 4 of us eventually.
Then I went to Target.
While at Target I made a purchase.
Bright Start Lots of Links was the purchase. Bright colored play rings that a baby or small child can gnaw on, drop a hundred times, link together, tether toys with, argue with sister over.....
So yeah.
I just bought something for my "baby".
How do you like that?
I like it.
I like it alot.

Three Dresses- Just Waiting

Leslie and Evelyn were out in the backyard yesterday, planting flowers and pumpkins and I was futzing about- cleaning up the house a bit and being a bit.....ummm......grumpy.
I made it into Ev's room and I was cleaning up bits of paper strewn about and tossing toys back into the toy box. I stood up to stretch my back and I took a deep breath in, then I noticed a bright sun patch just streaming in the window.
Then I was just hit with such an overwhelming sense of luck and gratitude that I just sat right back down and lost my grumps.
Here I am, in the middle of being a Mama.
Everytime I sweep, it looks like we have zany little elves all over because all of my dirt has bits of glitter in it. Sometimes I walk thru the house and I see little groupings of stuffed animals arranged around a miniature tea set. Sometimes I wake to find little pieces of art work that a certain someone has created and snuck onto my bedside table for me to find in the morning. Sometimes I find huge mysterious wet places in the house because someone is obsessed with water play. I can not keep any window surface clean. Every morning when I make my bed, I have to sweep out a truckload of crumbs because there is this little girl that likes to eat breakfast in my bed.
And sometimes when I am feeling grumpy , I look up and see the sun hitting on three little princess dresses that my daughter has hung up on her "fish rack" so they are ready to go when she needs to be a Princess.
And it's moments like that when I realize just how very empty my life and my home and my heart would be without her. It's moments like this that I thank God with every fiber in my being, because I love the messes and the glitter, the surprises and smudges. I love that we have a gajillion crazy bits of paper floating about. I love that we have shiny, swirly little dresses at the ready. I love all of these things because they are solid reminders to stop and think and realize what it would mean if they were not here. I love these things in my life because they mean that I am getting every single thing that I ever wanted. I love these things because they come with having a magical, creative, energetic and original human as your daughter.

Friday Fashion Challenge

Once again I have been provided with the opportunity to take part in the Salsa In China Fashion Challenge. On this day, Evelyn was dressed very cutely in a nice casual shirt/blue jean combo. Obviously, she felt it needed some spicing up.
Over top of her daily wear, she added a Fairy Dress, her "Link" belt and pouch combo, and strung a Soda Pop Pet around her neck. This is exactly how she ran around -for hours. Also the Link pouch was full of various implements and "treasures". If you look you can also see her butterfly necklace, this is her new favorite thing to wear and she goes nowhere without it. It was a gift form Dan and Cheri for Christmas and I couldn't get her to wear it for months ....now it is indispensable.
You can see more fun outfits if you check in with M3 at the Salsa Blog
http://salsainchina.blogspot.com/

The Perfect Mother's Day Gift

We do not spend alot of time or money on Mother's Day- or Father's Day for that matter. It has just never seemed like we should single out any one day, besides our Gotcha Day is always around Mother's Day and I would rather focus on that than anything else. Having said that, I did specifically ask for one thing this Mother's Day, actually I asked for two things but, sadly Star Trek Hallodeck technology is still beyond us, which is too, too bad as I had this whole Hugh Jackman thing planned out....I digress....
So this t-shirt is what I wanted. Bad. Like I HAD to have this t-shirt. Luckily Leslie heard the desperation in my voice and relented to buying me a Vampire t-shirt to celebrate my all around, general wonderfulness. Isn't that the sweetest thing ever?

Peach

The Bean has a friend. Her name is Peach.
Peach is a rabbit. A very diminutive rabbit.
Two Christmases ago, I bought Bean the Calico Critters Doll House. She was, and remains a bit freaked out by humanoid dolls. I figured that a Doll House with animals was right up her alley. I was right- to a degree. She never really got THAT into the whole thing until I got even smarter.
I bought her one of the little additions, I got her, my paper/shopping/cash register/receipt obsessed child- The General Store. The store came with a small, peach-y kind of colored rabbit to act as Storekeeper.
One day Bean says to me, "Mama let's play Miniature Store!" I agreed. I asked about the rules and regulations....I was told that I would be the rabbit, and she had to shop while Bean ran the register that is the size of a dime. No problemo.
Except that I got a bit.....bored.
So I started talking for the rabbit, who quickly became Peach because, yes, I AM that original. Then Peach needed a back story and I filled that in, then Bean jumped on board and started filling things in. Then the store stared having weekly specials.....It has all snowballed, in the most pleasant way.
Peach is now one of Evelyn's favorite ameeuhls. Peach is very real to her and completely separate from me. When I talk as Peach, to Ev, it's PEACH. They laugh together, they have little inside jokes, Evelyn calms Peach's cat fears.
Sometimes after we have been playing and Peach says something funny, Evelyn will tell me all about it- later, like I wasn't even there, killing my throat to maintain Peach's particular pitch.
Though I think that somewhere Evelyn knows what we are doing. She knows that Peach is me. I am very thankful to that small rabbit. Through her I have a different kind of friendship with my daughter than I ever would have.
Yeah some days, the last thing that I feel like doing is sitting down on Bean's floor while my legs slowly loose feeling and my throat gets worn out. Some days the thought of Peach's 24 babies and her many trips to the store gets to be a bit monotonous.
Every time Evelyn asks though, I say "yes!" and gladly lay down MY worries for the day and I go shopping at the friendliest, tiniest General Store that there ever was. Because one day?
One day she will stop asking. And the magic that is Peach and her world will fade. And Evelyn will discover greater and grander things in this world than sitting in a patch of sunlight in a quiet room with her mother.

Last Weekend

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Finally, here are the pictures that I took last weekend when Brevin was visiting. It has taken me awhile to get these loaded.
P.S. Ashland Radiology???? Girls?? There is music with this so hit the mute button.

Luck Of The Draw

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On May 8, 2005- I sat in the Hong Kong airport listening to a thunderstorm overhead delay my plane to Jiangxi.
I was a mess.
We had about 1 hour before the flights would be delayed (officially) and we would have to wait until the next day to meet our daughter. Now, 24 hours may not seem like that big of a deal, but when you have waited and waited and your heart and mind have been prepared for a certain time, well, anything longer is HELL.
The planes took off- late, but we were on our way.
45 minutes on the plane.
45 minutes on a bus.
Interminable meetings at the hotel.
Then the doors were flung open and I could hear crying and see beautiful babies, just there, in the hall.
I settled in for a long wait as Leslie and I are NEVER among the first for anything.
On this day, we would hear our name called out after only two other families!
"Leslie-Michal Dillon for Yi Fu Mei!" our guide yelled out.
I gasped. Glanced at Leslie. And I put one foot in front of the other until I reached my arms out and finally, finally, pulled my baby to my chest.
She was tiny.
She was beautiful.
She was all. Every good thing.
My daughter.
The hours and days, and yes even weeks, ahead would have their challenges. But they were no matter.
We had her.
She had us.
We were family.

I often think of how absolutely and profoundly lucky we were to be sent HER picture. I think back to that day we sat around our kitchen table in Homer, Alaska and checked the box marked yes, and I know that at that time I had no idea just how special our Match was.
Before I had Evelyn I thought I knew the limits and boundaries of human love. I was wrong. I love her more fiercely and deeply than I ever thought possible. Some days it seems as if my body will be torn apart by the force of my love for her.
We have had four years with this wonderful, tiny, dynamic person in our lives. Four. Some days it seems like just yesterday that I reached out and grabbed her for that first time. Other days, it seems as if she has been with us all along. Sometimes I will be remembering things that happened years ago, trips that Leslie and I took or meals that we ate, and I will think "Wait! Who watched Bean for us?", then I have to laugh because of course I am thinking of something that happened well before we met her. She is such a part of me.
I am in awe of the many things that had to happen to get her to us. I wonder how many mountains God had to move to open up our paths to each other? She is just my daughter. I can not explain it any other way. She may not have entered this world with the help of my body, but she is absolutely mine. I look at her in wonder and awe, there are things about her that could not be more similar to Leslie and I if she were of our same "biology".
I told Evelyn once that as long as there have been babies, their Mama's have known where and how to find them. I sure knew where to find her.
I am glad that I did. More than glad. There aren't really the words to explain my gratitude and wonder at being allowed to have her in my life.
We were at a local Chinese joint two nights ago. Our waitress was Chinese and had some language barriers but she was very curious about Evelyn. She kept exclaiming over her beauty and asking general questions. Eventually she said "How come you get her? You choose?". I didn't even think, I just blurted out "oh no we didn't choose, I never could have made a choice this perfect!" I am sure that the waitress didn't understand me completely. But I knew that Les and Evelyn did. We just smiled at each other, the three of us, and dug into out Hunan Beef.
Tomorrow marks our 4 year anniversary for our Gotcha Day with Evelyn. Four years ago I was a hot mess of nerves and anticipation. After four years I am still trying to get a handle on Motherhood, but I had the love down right at the first second. Four years ago, as I took her tiny body into my arms, my heart beat for the very first time. Four years ago, I came alive with gratitude and wonder at my lot in life. It took awhile for me to grasp the miracle that was Evelyn herself, who she was and how she fit us. I think that everyday reveals some new evidence of the miracle that brought us together and how she was meant for us. Four years ago I was just so happy to have "Baby".
Now I am so happy to have "Her". I know her now. I see her individuality. I am intimately familiar with her moods and quirks. I am not really sure what I ever did to deserve a gift such as Evelyn, but I am glad that I did it, and I am really glad that someone was keeping score.

Cousins

Quotes

We have had Brevin with us since Thursday night. This is after he and Evelyn had two nights together at Melissa's. It has been a fun time filled with ample opportunity for silly things to be said due to the reshuffling of powers and general kid savagery. Here are some:

Brevin: "First of all I mad at you...."
Evelyn: "No Brevin you flap and THEN you jump"
Michal: "Well if you think you have popcorn in your panties- get it out, don't just whine about it!"
Leslie: "So the sausage is on medium and I am heading out to the baseball game..."(this was said to me as I was in the shower with two wild hooligans who hadn't seen the legal side of a toothbrush or comb in 24 hours)
Brevin: "NO BEAM!!!!!! Dat my gun!"
Evelyn: "I'll pee downstairs and you poop upstairs"
Brevin: "I dodda pee!"
Evelyn: "I think we need to use swords for this job, buddy"
Evelyn: in the truck....blah blah blah, pause, quiet scream, two or three thumps from her general direction. And then she says with a sense of wonder and disbelief " I think I just killed my first spider......"
Leslie: was digging through the rag box in the basement and when I inquired why he simply said "Gags" and walked up the stairs.
Brevin: "I dot ober it" when talking with his Mommy about being mad at "Beam, DelDel and Uhtle Ess"

And my favorite quote of the weekend is from Leslie, who said, "Michal kids are like the Middle East. You want to maintain control of the general region without getting embroiled in individual Jihads"

Salvage Operation

I am all better now.
Who could keep on having a bad week when these two were there?

You Know You've Had A Tough Week When....

You are driving down the street, see an airplane at a weird angle, and think UFO, then the very next thought is " maybe I am about to be abducted and experimented on" and that doesn't seem :

1)outside of the realm of possibilities for your week

2)like too bad of an idea

Let's be clear, this is not whining. This is a factual retelling of some of the events that occurred in my life this week.

My sis took Ev for two nights. Great. Except that during the time that she was gone, I had diarrhea for one whole afternoon, Leslie had to work late on one of the nights, I had 8 hours of class the next day. One night, my sleep (and Leslie's) was interrupted (by interrupted I mean that there was a total of 60 minutes of sleep) by "Michal Weirdness". I had a constant low level of anxiety.

• I have been pulled over by the world's tiniest mean man cop and got a ticket for $150.


• I have had the tread on our truck tire separate. While I was on the highway, on wet pavement.


• I have had the pleasure of paying a tad over $700 for new tires on the truck.


• I have left the house to get to the store only to realize that my wallet was at home.


• I have been caught in a torrential downpour that lasted, I kid you not, only from the time that I walked out of the store until I was safely in the truck.


• I have had a man, huddle his daughter and shepard her around me as if I was the Devil Herself because I let a "shit!" fly when I dropped a bag of my groceries in a huge rain puddle.


• I have yelled the following at that same man, "it's okay I talk like that around MY daughter" before I realized that would only make him feel justified in his actions.


• I have handled my daughter wrong, from the time I walked into my sister's house to get her, culminating is a spectacular loss of temper.


• I have consistently stubbed my toe on the same corner of the desk- each and every time I sit down at the computer.


• I have had my blood drawn for my Physical. The phlebotomist was new. And creepy. A new and creepy phlebotomist that kept trying to force eye contact with me, while missing my vein.


• My cat is pouting at me for yelling at Evelyn.


• I accidentally ate a slice of pizza tonight, thus sending my Weight Watchers points to hell.


• I followed the pizza up with a coupla cookies - because well, why not.


• Swine Flu.
• For some reason even the movie geek guy at Block*buster was giving me the cold shoulder-man that was rough.
• We came home real late last night to make sure to get Ev in for a make-up Gymnastics class and the teacher was out sick- so no G class at all this week.
• I have had the waitress at a Cleveland landmark deli, openly question my fashion choice.

See? It's not just me right? I mean it is me, but I am not nutso in thinking "man this has been a helluva week" Right?

By the way, I am currently avoiding my husband because I lost it with my daughter tonight and I am just ashamed and chagrined and I don't really want any advice or talking. I just want to pretend like I am the greatest Mom on this planet and I DID NOT yell at my girl.

Do Your Duty People

http://www.mamapop.com/mamapop/2009/05/friday-eye-candy-save-joss-whedon-edition.html#more

Watch Joss-omeness and admit his genius! Do it!
Read above article.
Watch this show.
That is all.

Fashion Challenge Friday

Once again I am adding an entry to M3's Fashion Challenge Friday at the Salsa in China Blog. I have three pictures for today's entry.


This first picture is Brevin and Evleyn dressed up as they pleased, sharing bits of Evelyn's hallowed Link costume from this past Halloween. ON this day I had two "Link's" protecting the house.


This next one is a doozy. Those are Christmas pj bottoms and a long sleeved camouflage shirt. She also has her orange and yellow cat (named Peppermint by the way) dressed in one of her t-shirts.

And lastly... I am not even sure what happened here. Lime green and white checked shorts with white shirt but she added red, Christmas Penguin socks with black fancy dress shoes. In this picture she is readying herself to squirt Billy Bones with a tiny spray bottle (water) for some gross infraction of her rules.

If you want to see more Fahion Fun check out http://salsainchina.blogspot.com/!!!!