Toes

One thing that I like about Evelyn is that she always wants her toes painted. She loves when I make different designs on them, you can often find the both of us hunched over her tiny feet consulting on what colors to use and painting them on with toothpicks. These started out as ladybugs but ended up rather like strawberries, so that's what we called them. She is currently wearing the color that I call 80's Renegade, a chrome pink, for those of you out there keeping track of that sort of thing. ( I,myself, am obsessed with knowing the name for make-up/polish/paint colors)

I should also mention that in my family, we take pictures of feet. Alot of pictures of feet. This started with my Dad I think, so blame this particular weirdness on him.

Moody Blues

This is an illustration of Evelyn's current emotional state (please note: pictures taken within a 15 second time frame). Yes she is on a roller coaster and when she is not laughing or crying, she is doing her best to ensure that one or both of her parents loose it. I know this is a phase and as my Dad reminded me , this too shall pass, but , man! she can get snippy.
This stage of hers also happens to coincide with a "phase" of my own , a 5 day abscence of her father and some physical growth on her part that has resulted in her winning the award for Klutz of the Week! Needless to say, since the emotions are all over the board, the slightest bump can be magnified into a life threatening disaster, I can not tell you the times I have had to say " No Evelyn I will not make you a doctor's appointment for this ( a stubbed toe or something of that nature) ". Also since Les is away for a few days, I am all on my own here and I need re-inforcements in the best of times.
Hopefully with some extra patience from me ( where do you get that?!?!!) and some time, we will find our stride again, until then I am afraid my mother technique can be classified as 80's trailer park. eek. Seriuosly though, I am trying to change the way that I am reacting to some of this stuff and hopefully this will result in her coming along with me, that , or I will either be canonized OR imprisoned. ha.
I love Evelyn and really even though we are both acting like bee-othches we are still having some fun and I make sure that we end each day on a positive note, with story time, and cuddling and rocking in our rocking chair together, that's about all I can do until we are back on track.

Afternoon in the sitting room

Just a quiet afternoon spent in the sitting room..... The mosquitoes were really too bad to play in the yard (yes truly, as even if you were coated in bug spray, they were STILL swarming and eating on you) , this was a lull between house activities and a trip to the beach- thus the strawberry bathing suit.

Feet First

We are going to get this kid in the Halloween spirit yet. I decided to start at the feet and work my way up. So far, so good, the ghost socks are a hit. She is blowing a kiss in the first picture and then in the next you can see that it's true, Billy is never very far away from Evelyn. She also got a pair of socks with pumpkins on them, she does like those the best, but they are regular pumpkins as opposed to a particularly Halloween type. I think that she just doesn't like all of the faces and such for the typical Halloween stuff.....meanwhile my nephew is nuts about the stuff and is cuddling up to his Grandma's stuffed witch!

Bubble Bath Fun

Last night after an evening at the beach, it was time to get the sand off and freshen up for bed. What was going to be a simple little bath, turned out to be a whole different thing when you add Papa and some bubbles....

What we are reading, watching and listening to.....

I thought I would talk a bit about what we are doing for entertainment , for those of you that would be interested....
Evelyn:
Right now the two favorite books of hers are, Honey, Honey, Lion! by Jan Bret and Henry Hikes to Fitchburg by D.B. Johnson. The Jan Bret came from the library, this will be the second or third time that we have checked that one out, and it is a tale from Africa , there are lots of realistically drawn animals in this and a simple but engaging storyline. The Henry book was a gift from Aunt Jenny and her gang, it's based on a story form the life of Thoreau. Essentially Henry and his friend decide to go to Fitchburg and Henry walks while his friend works to earn money to ride the train- they want to see who gets there first. Evelyn never gets tired of this story! The pictures are wonderful and they appear simple at first but they are actually full of details. Last night when we were reading this story, she asked if we could go to Fitchburg, she wanted to go there and ride a train and then find a blackberry patch.

Leslie:
Les is always reading about 3 or 4 books at a time so I didn't try to get pics of his. He is now reading one called The Cork Boat , from the library; he was reading The Golden Compass, but has set that aside... I am sure that there are others stashed about the house.

Michal:
I am reading The Tin Roof Blow Down, sent to me by my Dad. It's the latest in Burke's Dave Robicheux series. I love this series. Dave is a New Orleans on again, off again police detective and these are mysteries around his cases and life. The stories are gritty and can be dark, but Burke's writing is clear and concise with vivid images brought to life by his poetically descriptive style. The secondary character of Clete Purcell almost single handedly makes the books worth reading. After this I am going to jump back into the world of Harry Potter. Recent e-mailings with my in-laws have gotten me in the mood to read this series again. That is all I will say, if I write anymore, this entry will end up being a 50 page breakdown of why the HP series is so great. Then Les and I are reading the latest Martin Cruz Smith, Stalin's Ghost. This is the latest in Smith's Arkady Renko series and we have read all of them aloud, Renko is never a disappointment.
One of my other hobbies is Crochet. I just got the Amigurumi book in and I have started on one of the projects already. I am working on the fawn and will start the monkey next. I am also crocheting a Christmas afghan for our house. It's a snowflake pattern on a pine green background, made in hexagons and then stitched together.

Watching:
We just started watching Planet Earth, a BBC series that is phenomenal. The images and photography in this are astounding. They used a new kind of high-def camera for filming and they are able to get stuff that has never been filmed before. I highly recommend this.
Update: OK although this series is enjoyable and incredible , there is ALOT of cute , fuzzy things being eaten by predators. Seriously. Alot. One particularly harsh sequence involving a tiny, fuzzy, yellow baby snow goose and an arctic fox. Now I realize that these things happen in nature , but do I really have to see it over and over again , for each species?? I think not. OH and if I ever see another seal get eaten by a shark again, I believe that I will loose my mind. SO maybe watch this one with the kiddies and one finger on the fast forward.


Listening:
Neko Case, Anne Savoy, Chris Isaak, David Gray and Dwight Yoakam....

Remember this?

34: or a Rant against the ravages of time

Well, a recent birthday for yours truly means that the numbers have flipped to reveal a 3 and a 4. yep. 34. When you think about it, it really isn't that old, it's just that internally I think of myself as 20 or 21. The other disconcerting thing is that when I look at myself in the mirror, or see pictures of myself, those images don't really jive with what I think I look like, so it's always such a shock. I mean here I am, with a new purchase of wrinkle cream for that "around the eye" area , and then I realized that the cream I use for breakouts is running low. hmmmm. Doesn't it seem like cruel and unusual punishment that a woman should have to wear both wrinkle cream AND acne cream?????? Shouldn't you outgrow the need for one , have a few years off and then find that you need the other? Also the same week that I realized I would need to purchase the w-cream, I glanced in the mirror and saw like 3 bright silver grays, right at the side of my head! WHAT?!!??!! I had just come to terms with the fact that certain parts are lower and require more support and then WHAM!!!- silver hairs? Also caught a glimpse of my thighs in the mirror this morning, I am still so traumatized by that, that I can't speak of it lest my brain turn to jelly and I have to be rendered to an assisted living facility a few years early....

All kidding aside, it was a great birthday. We didn't do anything too exciting but, Les and Evelyn made sure that I was surprised with a birthday cake and a card. They decorated the dining room festively and just made me feel special with the card that made me cry. It was nice to realize that at 34 I have more happiness than most people can accumulate over a lifetime, cheesy , I know, but, there it is.....

A Mama and her Girl

Well, after perusing the family photos I realized that it has been months since I have not deleted pictures with me in them. So I asked Les to take some pictures of me and Evelyn together. I am glad that I did and I will post a couple here, I know that even if I don't really like myself right now, Evelyn does and some day she will want to have pictures of us together from this time in our lives.

I think that it is pretty obvious that I am head over heels for Evelyn. I am not even ashamed really. I know that she is spoiled and I am ok with that. I will say however that even though she is spoiled, it's about things like my time and attention, the way we include her in the home and the way we make a special point to have a "family" home, she is not spoiled for material things. This does not mean that she is bad mannered , intolerable or that she runs the house, she just knows that we are always going to treat her with a certain level of respect. I always have Ev with me so, when I do something like go get a haircut or a doctor's appt and she doesn't come, I fell funny and off balance. Don't get me wrong , there are days when I wish to God that her Grandparents or and Aunt or an Uncle lived down the street so I could take an afternoon off but overall I am so thankful that I get to spend so much time with her. I guess that last makes it sound more mild than I feel about it, I love being at home with her, I love being here for Les and I love that I have the opportunity to enjoy them fully.

Good News for the Mader Familias

Well, today we spent all day in the car. yes another visit to the Neurosurgeon in Greenville, Dr. Jones. Here it is, the pain that I have been dealing with still, is not unexpected, nor is it anything from the disc that remains herniated and wasn't addressed surgically. Apparently I am somewhere in the middle of the spectrum of patient healing that goes from absolutely no pain after surgery or ever again ( why ,oh why could I not have fallen into that category???), to months of lingering pain and slow nerve healing. It has been 3 months since my discectomy/foramenotomy and I guess I can expect to improve over the next 3 to 6 months. Finally though, today the ban on lifting was lifted and I am allowed to do most anything that I want. This means that I carried Evelyn in my arms today for the first time in months, that made us both happy. I am going to be sore and actually have a bit of increased pain as I increase activity and all of those poor abused muscles and nerves get used to being in use again. Am I sore tonight from carrying Ev and having a pillow fight with her? YES. Do I care? NOPE. I feel like , now maybe I can start to get on track with my life again. The pain that I have been living with for so long has really done a number on me and my family. I am ready to move beyond it.
On a side note... Evelyn took Drew the Tiny Pink Pig along with us today to see Dr Jones. Well as soon as Dr Jones found out that Ev brought Drew to see him, Drew was given an official once over by North Carolina's premiere Neurosurgeon. Yes, Dr Jones is as nice as he is capable. Evelyn loved every minute of it and even broke her usual stony silence with strangers to answer questions about fevers and such.
Here I can hear many of you saying why take a 3 yr old to an appointment with a neurosurgeon?- answer= because I would never be forgiven if she had to miss anything vaguely medical. This is a kid who went in and watched her Grandpa get a surgical drain removed from his abdomen and never batted an eye! OH- and how did I know that she could handle the drain removal? Because she had insisted on watching and assisting with his dressing changes for two weeks. Seriously every warm bodied creature in this house gets thorough check ups at least twice a week, she even has a real stethoscope AND she can say "sphygmomonometer".

I just had to add some pictures of Evelyn in this dress. It's one of her many "princess dresses" and she loved wearing it. This was the fateful morning that we attended the Open House at the local pre-school to see if the Bean Dip would like to attend. Needless to say, even though it was her idea originally, she will not be attending pre-school. I am not sure exactly what it was that she didn't like, but she came away with very strong feelings against it. We decided not to push the issue. She is a strong minded little girl and I could see the whole thing dragging out into a god awful mess. Maybe we coddle her, maybe she is spoiled, but she is ours and we missed a chunk of her life already and soon enough she will be champing at the bit to have time away from us.

Just a picture today

Love Without Boundaries

Well, the Love's Journey 2 book is out and they are taking pre-orders. This is important here for two reasons, all proceeds go directly to helping babies in China and Evelyn's photos, that I submitted were chosen to be in this issue.

http://www.lovewithoutboundaries.com/index.php

This is one of the pictures that I submitted, it was taken in China, Evelyn had been placed in our hot little hands less than 24 hours before. The paperwork is the receipt that I was given after paying the Orphanage Fee to a local judge. I remember those few moments as some of the scariest in China! I can hear some of you saying "what? it wasn't the scariest when you realized that this little person was YOUR responsibility now, or when you realized that she had Bronchitis and you had 2 weeks to go to get her home to a doctor or when you realized that your body was starting to shut down from lack of palatable food?????? NO, indeed, the scariest moment was sitting in a huge leather chair that dwarfed me, facing an inscrutable Chinese Official who was counting and re-counting the money and making sure that it was in good enough shape to accept, and all the while my agency appointed guide was standing there nervously, so I thought "why is HE nervous?",which made me just about break into hives. It wasn't until I was back in the bus, with my receipt in hand, that I started breathing again. I will never forget those few moments, as in reality that was the final transaction to take place that made Evelyn ours in the eyes of the Chinese Government.

Just a Big Girl

Last night , the books were read, the rocking was done, Billy was in place in the crib awaiting his human and I laid Evelyn down in her bed, now, at this point she likes additional kisses, and usually I am required to "go atomic!" , this means giving her as many kisses as possible in 5 seconds. So all is done, the checklist is complete and I was about to leave her bedside when she says "Mom I need to tell you something". "OK", I say "what's on your mind." Then she says the following to me...." Mom you just called me a baby , you said good night baby girl" yes?..... Then she gets real serious, the way you do when you know that you are about to deliver potentially disastrous news to a person who may or may not have the wherewithal to handle what you are about to say, but you must say it anyway, and she reaches up and starts caressing my cheek, then says " I just wanted you to know that I am not a baby anymore. I am just a big girl. Okay?" As tears welled up in my eyes, I realized, yes there is not a baby there anymore, she is a big girl. A sad day for Mom but inevitable I guess.

Tea Party for Two

Last week, Evelyn had been missing her Papa and was very needy with him. Leslie's solution was to spend some good old fashioned quality time with her. They spent the morning playing and reading and dancing, the Big Event of the day was a Tea Party. The two of them busted out Ev's little tea set, tea was brewed, cookies were found and the polite converation began.... needless to say a day like that was just what Ev needed and she was quite pleased to be the center of Papa's universe for awhile.

Funny Girl

Here are a few of the funny things that Evelyn has been saying:

• The other day when I called to her, she answered " Yah Bee-otch?"


• Once I interrupted her and then apologized and asked her to continue, she took a deep breath and said "yes, you MUST respect me"


• "Mama I noticed this morning when I was feeding the cats, that you didn't have a scoop in Stella's bag, so I put one in for you, ok honey?"


• "Holy Crap! I just dropped all of my hair birdettes (barrettes)!!!


• Upon seeing three other Chinese girls at the pool, she leaned over and stage whispered "Mama I am thinking they were born in China too"


• "Billy you drop that hair birdette this minute, you can choke,choke,choke!"


• "Mama, why do kids have to make into grown-ups?"


• When trying to clean something up she was nearly in tears with frustration and she said " OH MAN! I am soooo G%# D&@#$ frustrated right now!!!" and then she sat down and wept....


• During the storm she was lounging relaxingly on the porch swing, slamming a freezy pop and said" You know? I think this storm is freaking me out"


• And this is my favorite, "Let me tell you something. I will NOT dress up for Halloween. I will NOT be a witch. I will NOT be a fairy. I will NOT be a lady bug. I will just be MYSELF." and then she walked out of the room.

Yes, you may notice and excess of swearing and fussing. What can I say? She is a fusser from way back and no one is safe.The Halloween statement came about because we have been having an epic battle concerning that holiday, for some reason she is dead set against a costume. It's hard to realize that your three year old won a major battle against you, as I was so shocked at her statement (well, partly shocked and partly I was thinking how funny she was and trying not to laugh in her face) , she was able to pull that one off. I told Les about it and he asked me what I did about it (we really don't let her mouth off like that), I said " Well Les, I didn't do a damn thing about it. I conceded the point. I think the winner in that one was obvious-don't you?" and then we laughed at our Spicy Brown Baby.

A Girl and Her Kitten

Well, yesterday, as the tropical storm was whipping about the place, we were upstairs watching Evelyn and Billy play around in the big spare room. It's the room that Evelyn calls "Lissa's Room" as that is where my sister slept when she was here. Anyway since her Aunt was here and she got to spend time in there with her, she has been playing in there constantly. If Evelyn is in a place then, so is Billy, so they both napped up there yesterday, Ev on one bed, Billy on another. As they woke up Les and I went up to take a couple of pictures (actually Les took the pictures). It was a nice interlude, as the trees and moss were whipping about in the wind, we were all safe and happy in the house, two of us still sleepy and languid from a nice long nap.

It has been interesting watching Evelyn and Billy get to know each other. I never knew that an animal could be such a friend to a child. Now, that's funny as I am all too clear on how much of a friend they can be to grown-ups, it's just that I have this idea that cats don't want to be messed with alot and manipulated, so I really thought Billy would be an interesting side bar to Evelyn's days. How wrong I was. He is a true little friend and is not bothered by the constant picking up and manipulating that happens when you are the pet of a three year old. They are inseparable throughout the day, he follows her from room to room and heaven help you if she gets outside and he is left in the house- he howls his fool head off to get out there with her. Inside they dash from room to room playing mysterious games and outside they race madly about the yard, chasing each other and falling all over each other. He is a gentle fella and had never scratched, hissed growled or bit at her and she takes great care of him, feeding and watering him everyday and monitoring for choking hazards. What a pair.

A Girl and Her Papa

We went to the beach on Friday, trying to get in some time before we were forced indoors for TS Gabrielle. While there at the beach, Evelyn was all about her Papa as she usually is on his first off -coming day from duty. They were inseperable and everything Papa said was cool and funny. I love to watch the two of them together, Les takes such care with her and her little personality. They laugh and joke and talk and goof off. As I sat ther on the beach watching them frolic in the surf, I realized that there on the shore was absolutely everything that is great in my life. I am so lucky to get to share my life and home with two people who are as kind and as funny as a person can be. It can be quite humbling to realize that you are the person in the household with the quickest temper, longest grudge holding ability and the one that is most likely to loose it, ahh well, I think that they love me anyway.