• The ten days for my stitches is up on Thursday. I am interested to see if I will nearly pass out this time. What a wimp I can be.
• I am going to try and re-schedule that appt for either a day sooner or later as Ev and I want to sashay our way to Smokewood to have some time with the Grandparents and also go to a County Fair with Lissa and Brevin. Well, either way we are going....I already have the bags packed.
• I am hoping a little visit with family will sort of settle the beast that is my daughter right now. I spoke a leee-tuhl too soon about her gettting back to normal.
• There has been ALOT of adoption talk around here lately and I am thinking that is what is contributing to Ev's erratic moods. I think she just gets unsettled and has a hard time sorting thru things. Earlier in the week we ended up talking abot pregnancy and the like (in a very general way) and that led to a very deep and emotional conversation that left us both teary and tired and worn out.
• Last night she told me that I was her step mother so we had more of a talk that ended in tears (good ones just like before) and.....I don't know . I hope I am doing this right.
• Evelyn found this little lady bug lapel pin that I wore during the wait for her. She is now wearing it for her "brother or sister or twin".
• I have decided that I would like to get my hair colored for the fall/winter. I am thinking a dark, dark brown -almost black color. I will NOT do it at home this time. I WILL pay to have it done professionally.
• I wish we were leaving for China next week. I am feeling like my baby is born and in this world and I want him/her in my arms. NOW.
• I watch Brevin and Evelyn together and they get along so well and are so very close that I am afraid that The Younger may mess that up. I love that they are close and rely on each other. Maybe they have room for one more in that special little club.
• Having written the previous statement, the kids will probably fight like cats and dogs at the Fair.
• I am going off to have another good cry because I just re-read that bit about Ev calling me her step mother and it makes my heart hurt so bad that she has to try and work these things out. I would not change the way she came into my life for anything, I would, however, change the pain that her beginnnings have caused her.