Running From The Monster

The monster in this case being anxiety from a number of different places.
The runner being ME.
I attended my first day of the Nursing Refresher Course yesterday. I got about 3 hours of sleep before I took off at the very un-Holy hour of 7 am. I arrived just in time, thanks to an accident on the highway. Took my seat and sat in lecture for 8 hours. Then I got in my car and came home (no traffic issues on the way back). I walked in the house and Les and Ev were all snuggled up on the couch (with Billy Bones there too) and they were reading.
I proceeded with the evening as best I could and then directly after we laid Evelyn down for bed time. I freaked out. Yes. For those of you that have heard about these first hand, or lived right above us when they happened- I had a good old fashioned , hasn't happened in at least a year "Michal Fit". Well, it was a level two anyway. (there are 5 levels)
I still don't feel better today.
I did figure out WHY I was/am a mess.
(Chris J? The Adopting Mother Syndrome has once again attacked my psyche!!! RUN! RUN! Oh wait, you are in St Louis- you're good)
There is actually a list. The problem is that I have not had time to process ANY of it. I just keep on trudging along. I think that lack of processing is the actual culprit behind my state right now. I mean this afternoon, I am still jumpy and have trembling hands and I just need to get out on my own.
The list does include some good things, one thing is THE BEST THING EVER. it's just that even when they are good, they have accompanying stress.

Okay here it is:

• The Adoption of The Mei-Mei (ALREADY I am gnashing my teeth at people who can not return phone calls)
• Returning to Nursing
• Going to a class for the return to nursing
• General Issues with Evelyn (you know those OMG! she's 4 things?)
• Les has talked (guilted) me into this damnable Fat Flush Plan and it is a diet that requires strict regimenting (NOT my strong suit) and a big cut back in calories in general with the addition of weird drinks. Also no carbs OR Dairy. (this alone is enough to make any mere mortal woman a bit techy)
• I have been forced recently to realize that someone very close to me has a drinking issue and I never wanted to believe that it was a problem so believed what was told to me and allowed this very, very dear person to suffer and fall - alone.
• Also it can be very stress inducing in life when you feel that you are the only one, between you and your spouse, that can actually feel anxiety. You start to feel weak and psycho and fragile.

So I had been running from the Monster and the Monster ate my face for a late night snack last night. I hope he got indigestion.